7 May 2020
Without boundaries you risk living in a quarrelsome home as each inmate does whatever they want and can always say they did not know of the boundary, rule or expectation.
When young children experience Boundaries for the first time they begin to learn about the real world and will find it easier to adapt at school and in later life.
Setting boundaries helps to ensure that relationships are mutually respectful, appropriate and caring.
How to set Boundaries
1. Invite all family members to a Family Meeting (this was covered in Suggestion No 2) to agree the Rules of Our Home (Suggestion No 1) and to agree a set of Boundaries.
2. Once these Rules of Our Home and Boundaries have been agreed write them up on a poster and place it in a prominent place where everyone will see it every day.
3. Ensure Boundaries and Rules of Our Home are clear and unambiguous.
4. Agree the Consequences for breaking Rules of Our Home and Boundaries at your Family Meeting.
Most children love routine and predictability and become confused by, or take advantage of, chaos and gaps
It is not possible to over emphasise the importance of consistency in parenting children. Children see sudden or inconsistent shifts in parenting decisions or actions as unfair.
They do however appreciate knowing in advance what the consequences of good and poor behaviour will be. This ensures that when they consider breaking a rule or breaching a boundary they know in advance what the consequence will be. Then they can evaluate in advance whether it is worthwhile.
This is a key element of disciplining children as you can point out that they knew what consequence of breaking a Rule of Our Home or Boundary was and that
it was their decision to break it. They have therefore made the decision to accept the consequence in advance.
The practical parenting skills suggestions we share with you are directly from our Win-Win Parenting Skills Programme which has been attended by over 257,000 parents.This applies at the workplace as well!
Boundaries and rules will enable you to be consistent in the way you treat your children.
Next week’s practical parenting skill will suggest how to use Praising to create harmony and love in your home.
Strong families are the backbone of society.
Please forward this Creating Harmony in your Home suggestion to your friends and extended family.
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